9:58

I've decided it's time to get fit. I watched as two of those undead shitheads pursued an old lady along the street behind the flat. I saw it all from my bedroom window. The zeds didn't move very fast, but the pensioner had no chance. The two zeds dressed in tracksuits, possibly in their mid 30s, gave chase along the street until their geriatric victim went over on her ankle. As she went down, the faster of the two undead grabbed her hair. A whole clump came away in his hands as she fell. I couldn't quite see what happened next because the trees round the back-green are fully covered in leaves. I watched as the zombies moved just out of sight, dragging an old set of spindly blood covered legs with them. I could almost hear her slippered heels dragging along the ground.

I'm not ready to help yet. I'm not fit enough, not confident enough, but I will be.

Here's my new fitness regime (starting tomorrow):

Morn (9:00 up on the dot no snooze)

warm up (piss first, if needed)

20 push-ups (to get the blood circulating)

Bicep Curl 2x30 fast reps (definition)

Tricep Curl 2x15 fast reps (definition)

Shoulder Press 2x20

60 sit-ups (various styles)

Exercise Bike (20mins)

I'm not trying to be the hulk or anything but it should help me on my way to becoming fit.